ARE WE OUR OWN ENEMIES

I found this sometime back I can't remember the author or the source but the message really truly touched my heart. As women there is the commonly used cliche that says "we are our own enemies" but this article begs to see it differently. 

Do we really hate each other? Much has been said about how women

demean each other and are in constant competition. This is not

entirely true.

Most of us are where we are today because another woman made it

possible. I can't think of a privilege I have had in life that did not

involve a woman with an open heart, willing to be a mentor until I

was comfortable enough to walk in my own shoes. This is not to

say that relating to females is easy.

There are women who will make your life miserable if you allow them

to. One truth in life is that even if drawn together by the same

faith, community or interests, not every woman can be your true friend.

There are those who will look at you from head to toe and find a

fault to pick on. Then there are those who want to be you (not

realizing that you have your own insecurities). There are those who

want to know where you shop just so they can rate your class and how

far up the ladder they are.

Then of course, there are those who secretly want your boyfriend or

husband. Thank God for true friends. Who else allows you to cry in

their arms in the office bathroom? One of my best friends was once

so distressed to see me in tears in the bathroom that she suggested

we go beat up the

person who hurt me. The image we conjured in our minds

was so funny that we burst out laughing. The hurt

didn't end overnight but I laughed my way through it because of my friend.

A Belgian writer, Dino Buzzati, once wrote that there is no one like

a mother. I could never dispute that, but, if I may borrow that as a

tribute to the women who value us and see the

possibilities in us, I would like to say there is nothing like a true female

friend. Only she can tell what you

need before anybody else can. She never forgets your birthdays. She is

constantly reaffirming your

value and your worth, not just as her friend, but also as

a part of God's plan in the universe. When you

make poor choices, she will agree they were poor choices,

but you won't hear it from somebody else. And oh, she never tires to

sympathize with your monthly woes.

A true friend would never compete with you. In fact, when life

beats you up so hard that you

can't dream, she dreams for you. When you can't afford a trip out of town,

she pays for your ticket. If you introduce her to a male friend, she

will ask you a hundred times if you like the guy before she shows

any interest. She would never date your ex because when he became a

jerk to you, he might as well have

become a jerk to her as well, never mind who was

at fault.

I have found that it is necessary to find female friends (and become

one as well) with whom you connect deeply. Women who are confident

in who they are without being arrogant. Women who know that there is more to

life than who is dating who and who

bought what from where. Today,tell all your female friends that your

world would be less without them

I try not to confuse excellence and perfection.

Excellence, I can reach

for. Perfection is God's business.